Hello friends! I hope your week was happy and glorious; I know (because I’m feeling it too) that holidays after so many weeks of lockdown parenting can feel like a bridge too far for many. One day, when my children have grown, the gaping chasm of the Summer Holidays won’t feel so wide. I know that. But right now, this is where we are, and I live moment to moment with as few plans as possible in order to keep things in a good place. There are some non-negotiables which do, I suppose, comprise some sort of ‘routine’…namely five minutes of gardening, a fair amount of outdoor time (rain or shine) and crucially, 90 minutes of ‘down-time’ (for which you may read SCREEN TIME) in the middle of the day. And a switch flicked in my brain this week which has had me hauling my sorry bottom onto the bike most mornings, so that twenty minutes later, sweaty and buzzing, I somehow feel more qualified to steer this ship. Here are my five minute forays for this week.
i so love your letters...I save them up to read with a cup of tea and possibly a biscuit - if there are any left. ;)
As the mum of a beautiful teenage girl who had an absolutely devastating mental health crisis a couple of years ago -- I am very familiar with the scene you wrote about. When our daughter was in the hospital we were offered a parent-support counseling thingy which we took and something I remember vividly was the therapist telling us that we need to learn to tolerate our own distress....because who doesn't get distressed when their child is screaming and raging and crying? And it makes all the difference to them when you can sit and bear witness to all that's wrong in their world without invalidating them with shushing and platitudes...which most of the time we don't even realize we're doing. Kudos to you. Hardest bloody job ever. xo
Gosh, I totally lived that last day with you. It really is and out of body experience isn't it! All those thoughts have run through my head, I have shut tantrums down, walked away and once it is all over and we have forgiven one another, I realise that actually, had I just offered my hug at the very beginning, all the following angst wouldn't have happened. Your are nailing it! x
Your newsletters are lovely and make me want to send you a hug x
i so love your letters...I save them up to read with a cup of tea and possibly a biscuit - if there are any left. ;)
As the mum of a beautiful teenage girl who had an absolutely devastating mental health crisis a couple of years ago -- I am very familiar with the scene you wrote about. When our daughter was in the hospital we were offered a parent-support counseling thingy which we took and something I remember vividly was the therapist telling us that we need to learn to tolerate our own distress....because who doesn't get distressed when their child is screaming and raging and crying? And it makes all the difference to them when you can sit and bear witness to all that's wrong in their world without invalidating them with shushing and platitudes...which most of the time we don't even realize we're doing. Kudos to you. Hardest bloody job ever. xo
Gosh, I totally lived that last day with you. It really is and out of body experience isn't it! All those thoughts have run through my head, I have shut tantrums down, walked away and once it is all over and we have forgiven one another, I realise that actually, had I just offered my hug at the very beginning, all the following angst wouldn't have happened. Your are nailing it! x